When Reliance Met Compliance

So much depends on this organ pumping blood through every vein

It feels every emotion with such a ferocious intensity; you’d think it’s malfunctioning

So much depends on my sanity

And the control I’m supposed to have over everything

But like the gods told Pandora, my box is forever closed

For fear of burdening the world of

My broken down dreams and lost hope

So much depends on me

and my capabilities to make the right decisions

and follow it without changing the course

But like a river

My mind is uncertain

It meanders through all the twists

and turns just to find some clarity.

So much depends on everythingso much depends

on every second, every hour

And yet, so little depends

on you

And where you chose to meet me

So little depends

On the fires you lit

and let die with neglect

So little depends on

Where you’ve been

and where i’m going

My life is crashing to a

Standstill of the final

Piecing of emotions, thoughts and feelings.

Whereas yours is only beginning

On the death of mine.

xx Malala 

 

Running… (PART 2)

woods

Suddenly the calm night air was broken by the cry of a bloodhound. It seemed like the whole night stood still, I hear the quiver of the leaves, could practically taste the wind. Then I felt it, the quiver of the ground, as heavy boots stomped their way down the hill towards. The cry of the bloodhound was answered with the resounding cry of another, then another, and another still, till the whole air was rent with barks and cries and of search parties. Harsh light pierced through the comfortable darkness, casting long shadows across the woods, and mixing eerily with the trees. “we found her!” a man’s voice pierced through the woods.

“Enyo!” I screamed out.

She calmly directed her gaze towards me, despite the man who doubled her in size and had her pinned up against the wall of a dirty alley. I quickly assessed the situation. There were four men in total. One had Enyo, another was holding on to a young girl who was struggling but getting feebler by the moment. The other two goaded them lurking just out of the way. I didn’t need a second guess to know that Enyo was tired. Jedd grabbed me by the waist, just as I tried to rush forward.

“are you insane?” Jedd hissed angrily in my ear.

“but…help…” I spluttered incoherently, watching the scene unfolding before me helplessly.

The pieces weren’t hard to fit together; I saw the greed in the men’s eyes for a prize they coveted but was not rightly theirs. One of the men ran his hand roughly over the young girl. She wept bitterly, she had lost all strength to even fight. The man pushed her forward and she fell to her knees. In a quick attempt, she tried to crawl forward to me and Jedd but the man kicked her mercilessly. Perhaps it was the thud her head made on the concrete or the blood that she spat out onto it, but suddenly time stopped. I knew from the ethereal look around me that Enyo had created a time loop that enclosed the three of us. All the men were transfixed in their positions and the girl was still laying on the floor, motionless.

I glanced at Enyo, waiting for instructions. To my horror, I saw her age, horribly. Her skin suddenly became amassed with wrinkles, she was stooped over, to half her height.

“I’m tired,” she breathed raspy. “you came just in time.”

“how many times did you do stop time?” Jedd asked, awestruck.

She shook her head feebly. “too many times.”

She slumped down the wall. I could see her physically focus on keeping time still. “it’s up to you,” she whispered. She closed her eyes and remained still.

“Calypso, act fast!” Jedd roared from somewhere next to me. The world had suddenly gone black; I couldn’t see anything.  The city seemed to spin abruptly and thousands of colours, sights smells and sounds seemed to merge into a conglomerate of senses that I couldn’t distinguish. It took me a moment to realise that the sensation was familiar. Jedd was controlling me. Somewhere in the depths of my befuddled mind, I thought, there is no more gravity. I stumbled onto my own hands and knees and allowed the magnetic energy of the gravitational fields to connect with my core.

“Jedd!” I cried in fear, searching for her gravitational pull.

She didn’t answer but I could feel a field of strength besides me. It was particularly heavy for someone of Jedd’ s size, so I knew she was fighting. With all the strength, I could muster, I pulled at the gravitational fields around me and felt objects around shift in their pull towards the earth. Abruptly, I felt weightless. When I opened my eyes, I found myself still firmly on the ground; but the ground was floating in mid-air. I spun around to find Jedd, and found her rocking backwards and forwards, clutching her head in her hands.

“are you ok?’ I said grabbing her hands. I had to focus hard on keeping the thugs, the girl and Enyo connected to our slab of floating ground. I knew that the likelihood of us being seen by others was low, the time warp that Enyo had created was still somehow working coupled with the rip I had created in space when I manipulated gravity. I knew that as soon as the warp collapsed, Enyo would be dead. Judging by the clammy texture of Jedd’s hands, she would soon follow. Jedd looked at me with very hollow eyes. It seemed like all the nightmares she ever had, were haunting her at the very same time. She shook her head dazedly and simply said, ‘it’s over.’ Out of nowhere. Jedd was screaming and it took almost all my concentration to hold the warp in place. And all of a sudden, we were crashing towards our original position on the ground. The explosion that followed was cataclysmic. Bright white light emanated from where I was and the earth beneath me seemed to pull itself apart. I could feel concrete splitting apart beneath me and the cracks travelling miles away from what I could only call the epicenter. For a split second the world turned black again, and I knew that the time warp had been destroyed. Natural light reclaimed its rightful place. I looked up and balked at the damage. Every single person in the vicinity died tragically. The young girl lay lifeless, her eyes still open stared imploringly yet unseeingly at me. All four of the men were sprawled on the asphalt, their eyes lolled in their heads. A stream of blood trickled from somewhere or someone and pooled at my feet.

Suddenly, I felt sick. I crumpled to the ground, heaving as I tried to calm my stomach down. I just couldn’t process what I had seen and what I had done. It felt like I had been there an eternity, but presently, a few people begun to walk by, ogling curiously and pointing fingers. I wasn’t bothered to move until I heard the sirens.

Then I ran.

By the time the men and their dogs had reached the bottom of the hill, I was nearly submerged in the river. The icy water swirled around my shoulders, embracing me and soothing my aching bones. I knew that my time too was almost up.

“we’re not going to hurt you,” one man said, as he approached. He stood on the edge of the river bank, and held out an arm to me. I looked over at him, even in the half dark I could see his gun.

“we wanna help you.” He said, almost kindly. I stared at him, unblinkingly, trying to calculate his next move. He stared back at me, holding out his arm all the while. More men joined him on the river bank. Though they didn’t look evil, I knew that I couldn’t trust them. So, I ducked under the water.

The pressure of the water held me down, yet I was buoyant. Ironically, knowing that I too had reached my end, I had never felt more alive. I focused my energy and tried to concentrate on making an air bubble. I scrunched myself into a ball and pulled as much energy as I could muster from the water. Gradually, the water particles seemed to lose their motion and draw themselves near me. The energy of the water flowed into me and combined with my internal energy, creating ice crystals and freezing the river. The men were becoming frantic; I could hear it through the vibrations from their voices. They were disturbing my process; I couldn’t draw all the energy I needed.

I began to stretch myself out, releasing all the energy at once. A familiar white light scorched the air, illuminating the woods brighter than day. Ice shards flew in all directions, lodging themselves in trees, narrowly missing men. And I was floating, breaking all the laws of gravity.

I could hear the men shouting, trying to figure out the source of the light. But the higher I rose; the more sentient I was.

I was the source.

Through His Eyes

dog eyes

Through his eyes

Love is cascade of people

Rushing straight through

The thoroughfares of this busy life

It’s a landfill of emotions

Left in the sun to

Heat up and dry;

It’s a cesspool

Of oceans of sentiments

Rushing in a whirlpool

Of swirls of words he doesn’t understand.

In his eyes,

She is the colour of perfection

In his eyes

She glows

An ethereal light.

A complexity,

A riddle to be solved

Through the careful

Unwrapping of intimacy,

She is the manifestation

Of all his hopes

But she only exists

Through his eyes.

 

Running… (PART 1)

I stumbled over a rock and cursed out loud. I immediately ducked down and tried to look for cover. Twilight had long settled over the small town but it wasn’t safe. It was never safe. Most of my day had been spent running away from the police and leaving far too much damage in my wake. Subtlety was never my strong point. Before, the others would help me with the cover ups but not anymore. I was alone. Jedd and Enyo had been killed. Scenes from the escape flashed before my eyes. So many things had changed. So many people had died.

I watched the two silently, as I had become accustomed to. A long time ago, Jedd had nicknamed me Calypso after the Greek goddess, because I only spoke when spoken to. Jedd herself had been nicknamed Athena by Enyo because of her fierce character. And Enyo had always been called Enyo. Before we met, we were separate. An entity that was relatively non-existent with powers that we could barely control. Enyo found us. I remember being in my bedroom, locked up by my terrified parents. Somehow, I never asked how, but she blasted my bedroom wall inwards and swooped in to “rescue” me. She had already rescued Enyo and together we were known as the trinity. The irony of the religious connotation always made me smile ruefully.

We never did anything particularly wrong. Sometimes, we’d cause trouble just for a laugh. But usually, we were angels. Or as angelic as three reprobates could be. Learning to harness our powers would often result in petty crimes. For a long time, I was the only the only who was still in high school. I distinctly remember being suspended frequently for inexplicable accidents. Like when I froze the water in the plumbing. And subsequently exploded the pipes trying to heat it up. I was the youngest of the three. I had the hardest time honing my powers. Jedd could manipulate people’s thoughts and feelings, and whenever a heist was necessary, she was our go to. While she couldn’t replace people’s thoughts or read their minds, she had an uncanny knack for guessing people’s thoughts and manipulating the information to her own advantage. Because of her sarcastic nature, it was easy for her to work around her prowess. Enyo could manipulate time and space, and often, I had been a victim of her stopping time altogether. But me, I could control gravity and matter. it took me a while to grasp, but I could change the states of matter of substances, and enable objects to levitate of the ground. At the full extent of my powers, I could even cause earthquakes, according to Enyo.

My mind snapped back to reality as I found myself stepping into ice cold water. I was on the edge of the county. I had been running for ages. My muscles screamed protest at every flex of the arch in my step, the stretching of my lungs as I breathed in and out, the beating of my heart that didn’t quite calm down. I was terrified. Of everything. Of what I had seen. Of what I had been a part of. The moon was bright, shining as bright as day, casting an eerie glow over everything. I looked down into the water, and a silvery reflection stared back at me. It resembled my face but did not feel like it belonged to me. There were cuts across her face, tiny but numerous, and many strangers’ blood stained what would have otherwise been fair features. Brown protuberant eyes peered searchingly, imploringly up at me. I blinked them, saw the stranger disappear as I came to terms that I was the stranger. I was the face. I bent down to wash my face, and allowed the cool water to run through my fingers.

Jedd stood on the street corner, wearing a navy-blue hoodie. She hid her face behind a newspaper that was two days old. I sat a few meters away at a bus stop. Doing what I did best, keeping silent and watching vigilantly. Time ticked by. Where was Enyo? It had become a tradition, I would sit waiting patiently for Enyo after school, looking small and scared. Jedd would come from her job at the supermarket and Enyo would walk down the street, commanding respect. Despite being young, only 27 years old, she looked like she was nearing 60. Every time she used her powers she aged ever so slightly. Now she was sporting silver hair, but with a young and lithe body. That day though, she was late.

Jedd sat next to me, and buried her head in her hands. “something is wrong.” She whispered simply.

I gave her a stricken look. “go back to your position.” I hissed urgently.

She laughed coldly. “today is the wrong day to care about the rules. One thing about Enyo is she is never late. She can’t afford to be.”

Enyo held a day job as a fashion director at the biggest magazine in the city. She forbade Jedd and I from interacting in the streets because she wanted me to live a “normal teenage life’. Yet my life was far from normal. By night, instead of studying, I was breaking boulders with my mind and levitating objects. I had been kidnapped from my parents by a 27-year-old in a 70-year old’s body. I never spoke. I had no friends apart from Enyo and Jedd. Jedd had been a foster child for most of her life, being shuttled from home to home. No one knew about her parents, perhaps they were dead, perhaps they weren’t.  Jedd was more or less a good girl, except for her several piercings and punk haircut.

I leaned back on the bench and let out a long breath.

“say something, kid.” She coaxed me.

“I’m scared Jedd.” I whimpered. Next to me, Jedd shifted uncomfortably in her seat kneading her head with her knuckles. We sat in silence and I watched glumly as our bus home left the stop without us. Enyo was like a mom to me. Suddenly, Jedd jumped up.

“I can’t do this anymore,” she announced, checking the laces on her shoes.

I hurriedly stood up, and slung my school bag onto my back. “what do you want me to do?” I shrugged, preparing for the worst.

She held up a hand to stop me from talking and squinted at the people coming towards us. “Panic.’ She muttered.

I stared blankly at her. “you want me to panic?”

“of course not, you idiot.” She huffed. “there’s an atmosphere of panic. Panic has the tendency to latch onto people unaware of why they are even panicking.” She paused momentarily, and pointed at a middle-aged lady, who appeared to be making a call, ‘she thinks something has happened to her kids. She doesn’t know what’s wrong,’ Jedd pointed out.

I raised my eyebrows.

“something has happened, Calypso.” She said finally. I glared at her, that was obvious. She gestured me to follow her and before I knew it she ran into the crowd.490